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So, last week I left off with my husband about to reveal the very depths of his soul which was really so much more than a longed-for dream or deep passion.
*He told me that when he was around 11 or 12 years old he felt like God was calling him to be a pastor.*
I'm pretty sure I didn't respond with a smile, a loving caress, or a word of encouragement. I'm more sure that I was sporting a stunned, deer-caught-in-headlights look just waiting, hoping for an "I'm just kidding" to follow the big joke. When I realized he was serious, I think I just tried to blow it off with something very much me like, "Well, too bad you didn't marry pastor's wife material. Heh."
I wasn't exactly feeling like a good Christian girl should. I mean, wow, my husband was revealing that he wanted to serve God for a living, and I wasn't digging it at all. I didn't mind serving and helping out at church as a volunteer, and I enjoyed trying to live out my own calling as a godly wife and stay-at-home mom, but a pastor's wife? No way, not ever. Just no.
I never minded when my husband served as a volunteer worship leader or taught Sunday School to college kids and stuff like that, but I was just fine with my husband having a normal job (outside the church) with predictable hours - a job that didn't involve me in the least. A job that didn't mix ministry with money. Yeah.
Honestly, the thought of ever being a pastor's wife had never even entered my mind. I was truly shocked. I didn't know the first thing about being "on staff" at a church. (I still don't, ha!) I guess I wasn't all that worried about it really happening at the time of revelation because there weren't any open doors, not even any cracked doors, leading in that direction.
It was a burden in a way to know that my husband didn't feel like he was living out his God-given calling, a burden to wonder when and if that calling would ever come to pass, and a burden to carry around my thoughts about not wanting it to come to pass.
Life went on. Years went by. Then, on complete faith, we moved to Arizona and started a new life because we felt God telling us to. Three days after we moved, husband got a regular job to begin supporting our family of five. There was one ministry opportunity that came up rather quickly after we moved, though. He was offered a part-time job to lead worship at a local church. He wasn't going to be paid much, but it was still a paid position. After careful prayer and consideration, he knew it wasn't a good fit. He turned the offer down.
Well, after visiting a couple of churches, we felt we'd found the one God wanted us to call home. One Sunday a lady heard my husband singing during worship, and next thing you know, he's part of the volunteer worship team. For about 4 years, he was a faithful volunteer in this ministry.
To make a long story very short, after a divine, unscheduled appointment at Fry's with an amazing lady I'd met at that church, my husband and I began praying about an opportunity to maybe help with a potential church plant. Months later, we found ourselves at our current pastor's home participating in the very first service of Calvary East Valley, with my husband leading worship, of course. ;) For 3 years my husband faithfully served as the volunteer worship leader.
Which brings me back to the dinner with our pastor and his lovely wife on December 18, 2013.
But, I will have to continue this story later since it's time to read aloud to my daughter before she goes to bed. And what a wonderful book we're reading right now - Anne of Green Gables, one of my favorites!