Welcome to the first post in the Personal Testimonies of Faith series! Today, Amanda is sharing her testimony. I knew Amanda from my middle school and high school days, and what a blessing it's been to reconnect on Facebook and hear how God has showered her with His love and grace. Be blessed. :)
As an adult I broke every single commandment. Even murder. I had an abortion. And for all the pro-choicers out there, I hope you never make the decision to end a life. The long term emotional scars are profound.
I hit an all time low when I was 33. I felt as if the whole world had turned on me. Everyone I loved, everyone I trusted. I had been prescribed Xanax by my doctor to ease the anxiety. One afternoon I decided I didn't have a reason to go on, I had even convinced myself that my children would be better off if I wasn't here. I held that bottle of Xanax in my hand for what seemed like an eternity.
I wanted a reason.
I wanted answers.
All of the sudden a warm peace came over me, as if there were love permeating the air. I knew..... I knew it was Jesus. I called out to Him, dropped that bottle, and stood up. I said aloud that I knew Jesus was the Son of the Living God!! I immediately felt a weight lifted from me. When my girls got home from school I took them to the park, swinging them high and just soaking in the magnificent creation.
About a week later, my husband I were driving down the highway and I saw books rolling in the median. I told my husband to turn around. He reluctantly did. The books were a bible and a study journal to go along with it. I was amazed how He gave me that gift. That bible has a crown of thorns etched into the leather.
He loved me.
Even though I was a big hot mess, He loved me. It wasn't too late. And even now I know His love is what saved me. Not condemnation. It's about the love. Until you can understand the love, you cannot fully understand salvation. Jesus came to redeem you to your Heavenly Father. To take your pain and shame away. When He looks at you, He sees worth and beauty.
You are loved.
Jesus loves you!!
If you are a believer, you have a testimony. Please consider sharing yours! If you are not a believer, I pray that you will receive God's gift of grace and mercy by faith through His precious Son, Jesus Christ.
"But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions - it is by grace you have been saved." ~ Ephesians 2:4-5